I LOVE debt contracts. Determining a nice big principal for you to pay off, having you send week after week, applying the interest as we go... but the problem is that I get your money SO slowly and that's not ideal. Here's the solution: instead of starting a debt contract and sending Me pathetic payments every week, you take out a substantial loan, send Me all of it at once, and then make your sad little payments to the bank while I enjoy My cash.

I LOVE debt contracts. Determining a nice big principal for you to pay off, having you send week after week, applying the interest as we go... but the problem is that I get your money SO slowly and that's not ideal. Here's the solution: instead of starting a debt contract and sending Me pathetic payments every week, you take out a substantial loan, send Me all of it at once, and then make your sad little payments to the bank while I enjoy My cash.