Heaven turned you away for being a deviant who lived a life of debauchery, but I am so sorry, we cannot allow you into hell because your little laughable dick is far too pathetic for our standard of evil.

Hell is a cooperative and we use one deviant as part of another's torment and you just don't make the cut. Your little dinky pinky is quite useless, and we will all be terribly bored with you.

I check with the guys above but St Peter says they simply won't allow you past the gates because of all the pinkystroking you do. They saw your browser history too and were not amus...

Heaven turned you away for being a deviant who lived a life of debauchery, but I am so sorry, we cannot allow you into hell because your little laughable dick is far too pathetic for our standard of evil.

Hell is a cooperative and we use one deviant as part of another's torment and you just don't make the cut. Your little dinky pinky is quite useless, and we will all be terribly bored with you.

I check with the guys above but St Peter says they simply won't allow you past the gates because of all the pinkystroking you do. They saw your browser history too and were not amused.

Not to worry! There is a place for you and others with little lego dicks just like you. It's called purgatory. You can float around for all eternity just teeny tugging on that weakling vienna sausage of yours without bothering any of the real sinners and saints who simply do not have time to laugh at you in the manner of which you are deserving.

BYE bb dick.