Hi Santa, I wanted to send you a little video since you couldn’t take me on the road this year, because I got too fat for the sleigh. I haven’t gotten out of bed since you left; I’m basically bedbound now. I thought you should know that I’ve been getting close with one of the elves here, I’m sure you recognize Aurora, and she’s been helping me out with some... things... while you’ve been gone. Well, she’s mostly just been bringing me food and feeding me, because we know you LOVE how FAT I’m getting. So today she’s gonna funnel me a QUART of eggnog. I hope you like it <3

Hi Santa, I wanted to send you a little video since you couldn’t take me on the road this year, because I got too fat for the sleigh. I haven’t gotten out of bed since you left; I’m basically bedbound now. I thought you should know that I’ve been getting close with one of the elves here, I’m sure you recognize Aurora, and she’s been helping me out with some... things... while you’ve been gone. Well, she’s mostly just been bringing me food and feeding me, because we know you LOVE how FAT I’m getting. So today she’s gonna funnel me a QUART of eggnog. I hope you like it <3