We have been spending a lot of time together lately and I have noticed you starting to take a lot of liberties with our relationship. Relationships are complex, especially relationships with high caliber women such as myself. Sure I let you hang around me, but if you are going to be getting comfy around here, it will only be if I am shrouded in comfort and luxury first. Since you so arrogantly want to move into my life, I will be expecting you to pick up the slack on all the chores and all of the pampering I need done in my life. From here on every screw up is going to bear a real physical...

We have been spending a lot of time together lately and I have noticed you starting to take a lot of liberties with our relationship. Relationships are complex, especially relationships with high caliber women such as myself. Sure I let you hang around me, but if you are going to be getting comfy around here, it will only be if I am shrouded in comfort and luxury first. Since you so arrogantly want to move into my life, I will be expecting you to pick up the slack on all the chores and all of the pampering I need done in my life. From here on every screw up is going to bear a real physical punishment and you will be getting no favors or rewards from me until you can prove your worth. In fact even just looking at me is too much of a privilege for someone of your worth right now. Since you are no good at your eye contact restrictions, we will be having this conversation while you wear the equality glasses, they give you an equal quality of vision to your efforts rendered to me. Maybe next time you will be allowed to see me clearly, if you can pick up the slack around here.