Part 1:

My girlfriend had this whole big day planned for Valentine's, but she didn't tell me because she wanted it to be a surprise. So I hung out with my buddies and got high. I totally forgot it was even Valentines. A commercial or something reminded me and I busted out of Jim's house to the closest gas station so I'd have SOMETHING for her....

I found some chocolate covered pretzels and covered them with the substance I was enjoying with my friends. Oh my god. She was so freaking pissed that I was late and all I had was some generic garbage. I hoped she'd at least try s... Show more